Boredom causes fatigue

Brain numbing boredom had me just about falling asleep in my chair at work this afternoon.

I realized I forgot to have a caffeinated beverage at lunch, so that's why I didn't make it I think. If I miss that, the fatigue chases me from 2 PM to 5 PM.

If you have fatigue, specifically MS fatigue or other fatigue, what do you do to make it through the day?

I haven't found a whole lot of insight into this because most of the people I've found online who blog about MS or share information about having MS don't hold down a 9 to 5 at somebody's office.

Again, I'm reminded of why I kept this blog going... there aren't a lot of people out in the blogosphere who bring home the bacon.

Mmmm, bacon.

Do you know any MS bloggers who have jobs outside of their homes? If you do, post their url in the comments.

I want to know them.

A Day

Today I took a day because I was tired.

It means that I won't get paid for today, but I think it was worth it to stay home. I can't afford to have this job kill me before I move.

I'm pretty sure that my boss doesn't care if he kills me, but hey...

I can take a day away from him, and what's he going to do, fire me? He already knows I'm leaving.

Had our first viewer of our apartment today. She didn't even look in the bedroom. I'm guessing she's not interested.

We've been warned that the weekend could be busy for people coming by. Oh... yay...

Nothing, not even vanilla, covers up the smell of vinegar. And according to my husband, vanilla makes vinegar smell worse.

Clueless

Joe and I both had opportunities to explore gainful employment today. Neither of us have any idea if the jobs we interviewed for are going to end up with paycheques any time soon.

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Had an online reunion of sorts today. That was interesting.

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Tomorrow there's hockey on TSN that I actually want to watch! Sorry New York Islanders at Pittsburgh, but you ain't my thing.

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I cut back on how much tea I drank today and now I want to got to bed at 6:30 PM.

That would be a dumb idea.

I suspect most days that my ability to function in the world is based on my ability to carefully balance my caffeine to blood ratio.

Forward Ho!

So a friend of mine stayed up until 5 AM yesterday morning to build me a website.

I KNOW, right? That's just crazy of her. It's so close to perfect right now I can nearly taste it.

I'm absolutely humbled by her efforts. I'm going to have to do something awesome for her.

I'm writing a manifesto. It is hard on my brain.

I have to schedule some time this week to get Joe to photograph all the completed x-stitch projects I've done this month.

I do not have enough energy to finish everything on my list this week, but with the help of a lot of tea and OTC caffeine pills I should come close to clearing the list. This is the part of MS that drives me crazy; trying to medicate myself through my day so I can have something close to a normal life.

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Movember cannot be over soon enough. Creepy 70s-porn-star looking weirdos are creepy.

And Aaron Rodgers... that's just a bad look for him.

No good NFL football until 5PM so I'm going to get shit done while watching murder on TV. (Watching "murder" is Joe's term for the true crime programming I like to watch).

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MOAR TEA! MOAR PILLS!

New twist

MS fatigue is the shits. I can manage a Monday to Friday 8-4 or 9-5 grind with medication and financial motivation, but it seems now that since I have no reason to get up in the morning my sleep works like this:

Week One: 4 hours of sleep after 5 hours of anxiety and muscle spasms every single night.

Week Two: 12 hours of sleep on Day One, 7 hours sleep on Day Two, 4 hours sleep on Day Three, 12 hours of sleep on Day Four, 8 hours of sleep on Day Five, 4 hours of sleep on Day Six and then 12 hours sleep on Day Seven.

Believe this pattern to be unsustainable.

Pep talk

I need a new job. I just can't take the chaotic upheaval that happens every time my boss shows up feeling like he's late or missing something. It's exhausting.

So...

I've been trying to talk myself into turning out a serious, serious job hunt; complete with networking events, cold calls and harassing everyone I know well enough to harass about my job hunt.

The thought of it is exhausting and spirit smashing all at once.

I can do this. It might take forever to be successful, but I can find a new job.

I hope.