Tuesday, November 23, 2010

FAIL

So I spent Saturday, Sunday and Monday in bed, in the dark, with the mutha of all migraines.

First migraine I've had in 2 years. First multi-day migraine I've had in almost 6 years.

Other than the migraine drama, I spend a great deal of time avoiding things that lead to my left leg nerve failing. When that happens I begin to drag it like one of the zombies in Dawn of the Dead. This makes me more tired because I'm dragging around a dead weight limb. Not getting enough sleep leads to generally dizziness, nausea and endless cognitive difficulties.

MS has cost me much of my long term memory and most of my short-term memory. I mean, I remember that I got married, but I can't remember my wedding; that sort of thing.

I'm tired of failing, either physically or mentally, every single day.

But I do, because that's the nature of my disease.

This is the new normal. It rarely gets better than this, and it more than likely to get worse.

Between the bullshit that is my body and the bullshit that is my job I'm quickly losing my will to live.

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