Almost

I'm in my husband's childhood bedroom sweating to death.

It's not supposed to be 25C (78F) in April, or May, so I am completely unprepared for this shit.

I will post some photos up on FB, but this is mostly what I can share about this trip.

1) Leaving 10 hours late is not something that can be made up the next day, or even the day after that. We were only planning on driving 10-12 hours a day, so finally on Day 3 Joe accepted that we had just lost a day.

2) When Joe was considering the distances we would travel in those 10-12 hours per day, he did not consider things like: stopping to pee, to eat, or to get gas.

3) The Motel 6 in Spokane, Washington does not provide shampoo, or soap, but you can buy them from the vending machine for a dollar.

4) Way to Go Washington State, Minnesota, and Illinois on your kickass windfarms!

5) I had so much of enough of Montana before we were half way to the Continental Divide.

6) 9 out of 10 I-90 exits in Montana have signs that say "No Services". That means there is no gas station, restaurant, or motel in the vicinity.

7) 1 out of 10 I-90 exits in Montana have a gas station, a restaurant, a motel, and five casinos. The gas station, the restaurant, and the motel will each have one, and there will be two free-standing casinos just off the parking lots of these three enterprises.

8) Same goes for Wyoming.

9) And South Dakota.

10) Probably the single most unattractive photo of me ever taken was snapped with Joe at Mount Rushmore. I deleted it.

11) Mount Rushmore was smaller than we both thought it was.

12) That's not to say it is small feat, just that it was smaller than we thought it would be as it related to the size of the rock face it's carved in.

13) Three out of three HOG members agree, Crazy Horse was better. We didn't go to see Crazy Horse. We didn't go because that shit is FAR from anything close to civilization. Unless you count the crazy tourist trappings of a place that only exists due to its proximity to a national monument as civilization.

(Think Niagara Falls, except at the bottom of a very, very, steep hill.)

14) I made it through eastern Washington, Montana, Wyoming, AND South Dakota without a single invitation to join a militia.

15) A medium beverage in the US is a Canadian large. Joe and I forget this ALL THE TIME.

16) OMG! 20oz Cherry Cokes 2 for $2.50! OMG! OMG! OMG!

17) The Flying J in Wisconsin is the best Flying J of all the Flying Js we visited. You could tell by the flower arrangements in the ladies room that they were clearly going the extra mile.

18) This may be due to the fact that Wisconsin is, as it stands, an awesome place.

19) Boca Chica in Minneapolis serves the BEST Patron tequila margarita ever. Food's pretty good too.

20) Beefaroo is one of the things that makes America great- along with Baconalia at Denny's, camoflage meshback trucker caps that say "Hard Core Carnivore", and 30 oz. of Cherry Coke for $1.

21) I am eating nothing but vegetables, fruit, oat bran, and greek yogurt for a month after this trip.

22) Nine states in five days is not something I'd advise, but I don't regret it at all.

More about our destination, when we finally get to it.